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Writer's pictureTess Miller

How Holding On Holds Us Back

Did you know that I have a coach? Actually, I like to think that I have 2 coaches. One is the personal coach with whom I discuss goals and to whom I report accountability. The second is my inner coach. This one is with me at all times and in all places.


Recently, both of my coaches pointed out a huge limiting belief that was holding me back. It’s never fun to see that whatever is making me feel STUCK is really just me. And yet, my coaches were right.


Long-held beliefs are fascinating. With awareness, we can see them operating in our lives all the time. We might know on some level that they are the reason we can’t make the changes we say we want to make in our lives. And yet, we cling to them.


I was holding really tightly to a belief that I adopted when I was really young. Like, 4-years-old young. 40 years later, this belief is holding me back in my business and in my personal life.


However, now that I’ve brought this belief to the surface, I’m able to really see it, understand how it’s operating in my life, and start to make choices that reflect who I am today and what I want to believe instead.


The belief I am ready to banish is that I don’t deserve to have the things that I want. This belief has prevented me from asking for what I want, both personally and professionally. When it surfaces, it makes me feel small and unworthy. It steers me in the direction of comfort over change every time. It is also the reason why it takes me forever to make simple decisions when shopping. I have to run every purchase through my “worthiness” filter. And after all of that, I’ll usually end up not buying anything.


This is such a waste of time and energy!


In this episode of Growing in Uncertainty, I share the entire story of how I discovered my limiting belief, how it has affected my life, and what I’m doing about it to create powerful change and forward motion.



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